The plot twist everyone is begging you to take

I'd like to play a little game with you... you see, most women come to me saying that they aren't sure what they want, or they don't know how to get it.

But respectfully, I think that's bullish*t.

I would argue that women know exactly what they want, and they know exactly what steps they need to take to get it.

🌀Most of us want to feel healthy, fit and strong in our bodies, well into old age. We want to sit on the floor, jump on the trampoline and laugh without peeing ourselves. We want shiny hair and clear skin and clothes that highlight our assets and hide the parts of we want hidden.

🌀Most of us want a loving, romantic relationship, where we feel deeply taken care of. We want an equal who makes us laugh, genuinely cares about our day, and thoughtfully runs the bath or cooks dinner when we seem a bit off, a bit tired. We want to be reminded that we're desirable, we want to be held and we want to be appreciated.

🌀Most of us want a business or a career that allows us the kind of creativity that lights us up every morning, time freedom so that we can still enjoy life without feeling trapped, and work that feels purposeful because we're well-compensated so we never have to worry about delaying our hair colour again to pay another bill.

The problem is, that most women have been told it's too unrealistic to actually have what we want.

So we get scared that maybe we're not special enought for it, we talk ourselves out of the desire for it, and feel shame for even thinking we could get it in the first place.

Why does that happen?

We actually self-sabotage our desires and dreams because new ideas, new environments, and new circumstances feel unfamiliar and unsafe to us.

The truth is, that even though the external realities of humankind have evolved in the last two thousand years, our inner identities haven't. 

We're still operating from the part of the our mind that we affectionately call the Reptilian Brain— the part of our brain that forms between conception and 6 months and is responsible for our primary survival needs like food, water, shelter.

So even though you may have abundant access to those resources today (and you have probably achieved it all on your own- hello strong independent woman), in the past your ancestors worked together in communities to ensure safety.

And anything that threatens our current circumstances, including rejection, judgement, or perceived failure, will trigger the Reptilian Brain response that is hardwired into your sense of survival...

In reaction, your nervous system will sends danger signals to your body and your heart will start racing, your breath will become short, your palms might sweat all because your primary fear of being different, being rejected, and being excluded from the tribe literally meant death not so long ago.

Your brain will shout at you that it's a stupid idea and play a montage of all the ways it can and will go wrong in an effort to keep you safe.

Your mind, seeing these images play out, will create the associated feelings of fear, shame, anxiety and dread in your physical body (yes, even if they haven't happened yet!) 

This very human response is what makes movies so interesting for us... we can feel the charcater's pain without actually being in it, without having to make those life-altering plot-twist decisions for ourselves.

Watching other people's stories play out in a movie is 'safe' for us... We can see what the best path forward is and we can see the plot twist that needs to happen even when the main character still seems to hesitate.

Even the minor characters of the film seem frozen in place, offering bad advice and running into obvious roadblocks. But as the audience, we can still think and reason clearly, because it's not actually us in the thick of it.

We're sitting there munching on our popcorn, screaming at them to just make the decision, any decision, so they can hurry up and move forward, because we're not involved in the emotional turmoil of the moment.

I wonder, if you were to imagine your own life as a movie right now and you were the main character, what plot twist would the audience be screaming at you to hurry up and take?

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Maybe they’re shouting at you to leave the job. To book the flight. To finally have the hard conversation, or admit you’re not happy, or start the thing you’ve been putting off for years.

Maybe they’re crying in frustration because they see your potential so clearly, and they can’t understand why you’re still asking the same people around you for advice when they've never experienced your particular dream and their advice keeps leading you to their life, not yours.

But here’s the thing: you’re not stuck in life because you’re incapable.

You’re stuck because you’re too close to it. You’re inside the movie.

And you're asking other people for advice who are stuck in it with you, and who can't see the whole picture objectively.

And that’s where I come in.

If you’re ready for your own plot twist...

Ready for the health, the wealth, and to be deeply held in love...

Ready to stop letting that ancient fear write the script of your life...

I'm the objective audience that you need.

As a life coach, I'll help you objectively see your life and where you're currently heading, and then I'll help you see the obvious plot twist and next steps you need to take for the life you actually want.

Like my 1:1 client who was determined to make her relationship work even though she knew that she wanted more respect, more support, more kindness from her partner... within 60 minutes (our very first call!) she recognised what her intuition had been screaming at her all along: He would never treat her the way she deserved, no matter how much she did for him. She packed her bags and was on a plane home the very next day.

I’m offering you a free 30-minute Clarity Call to help you zoom out, get honest, and see your next scene with crystal clarity.

You are the main character of your own movie.

You get to decide the direction for the next scene.  

You hold the script  and the next move is yours, what are you choosing? 

Book me in: Clarity Call